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3MM: Problems, Andrew Tate & Denny's
3 MINUTE MONDAYHi friend, “20 years from now you’d give anything to be this exact age, exactly this healthy, in this exact moment.
Take a second to enjoy it.” — Richard Webster
We trade the thing we want (time) for the thing which is supposed to get it (money). We give up time to make money so that we can finally have more time when we have enough money. We give up happiness to achieve success so that we can finally enjoy happiness when we achieve enough success. “However much you feel you need to plan for the future, to anticipate it, to mitigate risks, the reality of your life is now.
Even when we think we’re in the present moment, we’re, in very subtle ways, always looking over its shoulder, anticipating what’s coming next.
We’re always solving a problem.
And it is possible to simply drop your problem, if only for a moment.” — Sam Harris
Many, maybe all, of the things we do, are an attempt to give ourselves a good enough reason to just be here, existing in the present moment. Being choked during sex stops the chatter of our mind, as does drugs, as does alcohol, and fighting, and reading, and dancing on a beach to a DJ as the sun sets. Our goal as awakened humans should be to lower the required height of the stimulus bar to a level where you can be present without having any of these inputs. “If you can’t be present with a coffee, you won’t be present on a yacht.” Think about how many times your presence has been hijacked by fears or worries or hopes for problems of the future, or regrets & victories around problems of the past. As you flee from boredom before it even rears its head with a screen in your pocket. We are so averse to time without distraction that we’ve become addicted to solving problems, so much so that our minds create problems purely for the purpose of solving them. The only thing you have is this moment. Holy fuck man we’re alive. How astronomically insane is that. A random collection of matter coalesced into a form that can contemplate its own existence for 4000 weeks before it vanishes forever. Enjoy life. This is not a dress rehearsal. MODERN WISDOMI do a podcast where I pretend to have a British accent. You should subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. This week’s upcoming episodes: Monday. Thursday. Saturday. THINGS I'VE LEARNED1. Only 36% of ethnic minorities see Andrew Take as Very Unfavourable compared to 65% of Whites. “In popular left-wing discourse and in some of the academic literature, the manosphere has often been described as a gateway to far-right or White supremacist movements. But actually, fans of Andrew Tate are disproportionately ethnic minorities. This is consistent with research on incels: Sparks (2023) found approximately 48% of an incel sample to be non-White and Costello (2022) found 36% of an incel sample to be BIPOC. Relatedly, about half of incels also identified as left on the political spectrum. This also seems to be the case at a glance of popular “red pill” influencers: like Tate, the sphere seems to be led by men of ethnic minority background. There is relatively little ideological overlap between these dating ideologies and racial or nationalist ideologies. They rarely talk about them at all. If they do, it is often in opposition (the “red pill vs tradcons”). Much of the manosphere has more in common with left-wing social justice ideologies than it does with right-wing racist ideologies. Some subcultures (like MRAs) are little more than inversions of activist feminism, where concerns about gender inequality are paramount. They are concerned with equitable outcomes in romantic relationships and employment for men, they substitute “gynocracy” for the feminist idea of “patriarchy” in their own folk sociology of the world. Incels also have their own folk psychology of “white privilege” that they call “Just Be White (JBW).” It’s the same phenomenon that is described as “dating racism” in academic literature: romantic biases in Western nations that favor White individuals. The manosphere is really more of a “rainbow coalition” than an ethnically homogeneous, far-right movement. I know a lot of people see manosphere content and find the way men, women, and relationship dynamics are described as very unrelatable. The manosphere appeals heavily to the “lived experience” of its subculture members, but the “lived experiences” of the majority outgroup is very different. Perhaps part of the reason for this is the high ethnic and cultural diversity in the manosphere. You hear a lot from men who would never have been in your dating pool, peer group, or on your radar because they come from a very different background.” — Alexander DatePsych 2. “Working class food tastes better than it looks and upper class food looks better than it tastes.” — Rob Henderson 3. Your fear of looking stupid to people you don’t know is holding you back. LIFE HACKThe only sale Neutonic has ever done outside of Black Friday. Use code: BIRTHDAY10 10% OFF everything sitewide for 48 hours only, ends 7am Wednesday GMT Includes an additional 10% off subscriptions. UK Free Shipping at £30. USA Free Shipping at $75. Shop my Neutonic Birthday Sale now. Big love, Try my productivity drink Neutonic. PS |
3 Minute Monday
Podcaster with 1bn+ plays. I write about the most important lessons from the best thinkers on the planet. 300,000+ people read my free newsletter. Press subscribe to join.
3 MINUTE MONDAY Hi friend, It is a sad fact that it’s more socially acceptable to be your own biggest critic rather than your own biggest cheerleader. This creates a fertile environment for external criticism to make you doubt yourself more than it should. Here are some strategies you may have used to try and avoid the pain of criticism with varying degrees of success: Get bitter and think of any critic as a hater just throwing envy and shade; recite the quote “Don’t take criticism from...
3 MINUTE MONDAY Hi friend, Some advice on how to support men. Men want to aim high without feeling insufficient if they fall short. Men want their suffering to be recognised and appreciated without being pandered to or patronised and made to feel weak. Men want to believe that they can be more without feeling like they’re not enough already. Men want to be able to open up without being judged. Men want support without feeling broken. Men want to be loved for who they are not for what they do....
3 MINUTE MONDAY Hi friend, “Dopamine is not about the pursuit of happiness, it is about the happiness of pursuit.” — Dr Robert Sapolsky So true. So much of life and enjoyment is about the anticipation of things coming. In fact, the anticipation is often actually more enjoyable than the experience itself. Tim Ferriss used to book week-long holidays years and years in advance so he could get as much enjoyment out of the anticipation as possible. This puts a new perspective on “it’s not the...